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Top-10 Funny Sporting Quotes

Here is my top list of favorite funny sporting quotes. See also the list of classic sports funny quotes. See also my top 10 quotes from a range of sports.



  1. "This is Gregoriava from Bulgaria. I saw her snatch this morning during her warm up and it was amazing." Weightlifting commentator at the Olympic Snatch and Jerk Event
  2. Before the New Zealand v England World Cup semi-final: "Remember that rugby is a team game; all 14 of you make sure you pass the ball to Jonah." Anon fax to N.Z. team (1995)
  3. The three toughest fighters I've ever been up against were Sugar Ray Robinson, Sugar Ray Robinson, and Sugar Ray Robinson. I fought Sugar so many times, I'm surpised I'm not diabetic! Jake LaMotta
  4. He had an eternity to play that ball… but he took too long over it. Martin Tyler, English football commentator
  5. "Ah, isn't that nice, the wife of the Cambridge president is hugging the cox of the Oxford crew." commentator at a trophy ceremony BBC TV Boat Race 1988
  6. "One of the reasons Arnie Palmer is playing so well is that, before each final round, his wife takes out his balls and kisses them. Oh my God, what have I just said." US Open TV Commentator
  7. "You can make a lot of money in this game. Just ask my ex-wives. Both of them are so rich that neither of their husbands work." Lee Trevino
  8. "He dribbles a lot and the opposition doesn't like it. In fact you can see it all over their faces." Basketball analyst
  9. "We can't win at home. We can't win on the road. As general manager, I just can't figure out where else to play." Pat Williams, Orlando Magic general manager, on his team's 7-27 record in 1992
  10. The Gullikson twins here. An interesting pair, both from Wisconsin Dan Maskell


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