Here is my top list of favorite funny sporting quotes related to the Olympic Games:
- "Put a bet on the Paralympics the other day; try telling the bookies that they're all winners."
- "I was not talented enough to run and smile at the same time"
- "Curling is not a sport. I called my grandmother and told her she could win a gold medal because they have dusting in the Olympics now."
- "Here's a good trick: Get a job as a judge at the Olympics. Then, if some guy sets a world record, pretend that you didn't see it and go, "Okay, is everybody ready to start now?"."
- "Performance enhancing drugs are banned in the Olympics. OK, we can swing with that. But performance debilitating drugs should not be banned. Smoke a joint and win the hundred meters, fair play for you. That's pretty damn good. Unless someone's dangling a Mars bar off in the distance."
- "At the Olympics in China, every color was represented ... and that was just the drinking water."
- "Finishing second in the Olympics gets you silver. Finishing second in politics gets you oblivion."
- "In Hollywood you can see things at night that are fast enough to be in the Olympics in the day time."
- More Olympics Fun
- Serious Olympic Games Quotes
- Funny Quotes Home
- Sports Quotes — the serious stuff
- More funny sports things