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Golf Funny Sporting Quotes

Here is my top 10 list of favorite funny sporting quotes from the sport of Golf

1. "One of the reasons Arnie Palmer is playing so well is that, before each final round, his wife takes out his balls and kisses them. Oh my God, what have I just said." US Open TV Commentator

2. "Give me the fresh air, a beautiful partner, and a nice round of golf... and you can keep the fresh air and the round of golf." Jack Benny

3. "You can make a lot of money in this game. Just ask my ex-wives. Both of them are so rich that neither of their husbands work." Lee Trevino

4. "I'm not saying my golf game went bad, but if I grew tomatoes, they'd come up sliced." Lee Trevino

5. "I owe a lot to my parents, especially my mother and father." Greg Norman, Pro Golfer

6. "These greens are so fast I have to hold my putter over the ball and hit it with the shadow." Sam Snead

7. "Golf and sex are about the only things you can enjoy without being good at." Jimmy Demaret

8. The reason the pro tells you to keep your head down is so you can't see him laughingPhyllis Diller, entertainer

9. "The least thing upsets him on the links. He missed short putts because of the uproar of butterflies in the adjoining meadows." P.G. Wodehouse

10. "After all these years, it's still embarrassing for me to play on the American golf tour. Like the time I asked my caddie for a sand wedge and he came back ten minutes later with a ham on rye." Chi Chi Rodriguez

Related Pages

• Funny Quotes Home
• Sports Quotes - the serious stuff, including Quotes from Golf.